Today I bought my first pair of size 26 jeans… Yep, you read it right…. Size Twenty-Six. I have NEVER been this big in my life, I didn’t even weigh this 9 months pregnant with Eden. I realised CHANGE has to come.
I could blame many things, there are a lot of genuine contributing factors as to how it got this bad, not the least of which is how crippled I am in pregnancy, pretty much unable to move out of bed due to hyper mobility (all my joints dislocating) and severe SPD. Hyperemesis preventing me from eating pretty much anything other than dry food such as bread, chips, crips, crackers etc. Two pregnancies in quick succession, but Eden is now 15 weeks old. I had lost all my pregnancy weight (17 kg’s) from Judah 2 weeks after he was born, and the first week I was pretty much bed bound in hospital.
I have decided as humiliating as it is (for me, this is hugely out of my comfort zone), I am going to document my progress, wins and fails in this feature ‘Depressed with Dieting : my baby weight loss journey’.
I currently weigh : 136.8kg’s
I ate today : no breakfast *fail*, a big portion of chicken and mushroom pasta (a Morrisons special) for lunch, and a tomato and meatball slimming world special (cooked by my lovely hubby) for dinner. Although, don’t think he realised that because the meatballs weren’t lean meat it wasn’t strictly slimming world.
I drank today : some cranberry and raspberry fruit juice (only enough to wash down the 2 doses of Sudafed I’ve consumed, we all keep being ill), an extra shot of espresso Costa Coffee mocha latte, and some coca cola that was still on my bedside table left over from the takeaway we had last night.
I have no issue with people who are bigger built and this feature is not set up to offend anyone but my poor joints are suffering *badly* and I want to be able to play with my babies as they grow up. I used to teach dance and have a size 6 waist for goodness sake, my frame was not designed to carry this much weight.
So, I am going to keep an accurate, honest account through this feature and hope that it helps others out there too…. even if it’s just by knowing that you are not alone, others feel the way you do.
Let’s see what happens …